Your Ex-Lover is Dead

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It was the simplest break-up one could possibly have. Quiet too. No real lash-outs, no angry confrontations that end in equally passionate embraces - or smoldering hatred as both parties leave. There was none of that.

It was just me, after the message has been sent, fighting with my own emotions. The doubts that haunted me in the relationship are gone - only to be replaced by increasing frustrations: what do I do now; is there anyone who is worth it; am I willing to wait. Question after question hounds upon me.

There are no answers, not yet. The future is nice enough but somehow, I'm too impatient to wait for it.

I look back on the message I've sent - explaining, imploring, and going into great detail as to why I am making the decision - have made the decision. The way she replied, I may as well have just said "It's over", and go on our merry ways.

But I can't just do that - I needed to explain, and I did, to the best of my ability.

And now I'm just waiting until God gives me an answer (or several) to what my future holds. Or maybe I should just let my life go and leave it for God to handle.

In the end, I'm still stuck with the thoughts in my mind and the questions that haunt me.

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