Thoughts of a Violinist Giraffe

This upsets me more than you know. Upsets me more than you know so let me out. Just let me out. I can't stop myself from screaming out awkward nonexisting obscenities at the wall. I'm gonna fall. And it's gonna hurt. It's gonna hurt so bad. Just let me talk it out. Just let it ring on out now. I'm telling you I'm running out. I'm running out of here so don't stop me. Just don't stop me. There's no way out but the steps that I take are showing a way back to what back to what I believe is right. And I'm feeling better now. I'm feeling better now. Just let me scream it out. Just let it ring on out now. This upsets me more than you know. Upsets me more than you know so let me out. Just let me out and find it out. ~~~~~~~~~~ A need to run away and find what made life so beautiful. I wonder how I'll use this.

It was the simplest break-up one could possibly have. Quiet too. No real lash-outs, no angry confrontations that end in equally passionate embraces - or smoldering hatred as both parties leave. There was none of that. It was just me, after the message has been sent, fighting with my own emotions. The doubts that haunted me in the relationship are gone - only to be replaced by increasing frustrations: what do I do now; is there anyone who is worth it; am I willing to wait. Question after question hounds upon me. There are no answers, not yet. The future is nice enough but somehow, I'm too impatient to wait for it. I look back on the message I've sent - explaining, imploring, and going into great detail as to why I am making the decision - have made  the decision. The way she replied, I may as well have just said "It's over", and go on our merry ways. But I can't just do that - I needed to explain, and I did, to the best of my ability. And now I'm...