Thoughts of a Violinist Giraffe

There lives a storm raging, continually changing, expanding and taking all it sees in the deepest recesses of my soul. It twists and writhes over seas, over mountains, over every thing that breathes and reaches out of me. The slightest detail on my face is read to mean the curious thing beneath the surface. So close, outsider, observer... You're so close but you're a little more than off. Don't try harder, don't get caught in the storm that rages in my heart.

I'm cold on this side of the mountain side. Though I climb, I can't decide I can't decide whether to climb or to hide my feelings away on this mountain side. I'm too scared to look over the sky-high, snow-covered top. Should I move slower move slower just to find if it's alright to shine or cover away these feelings I harbor. Here I am just wondering. Here I am, blundering away - my anxieties eating away every bit of me that is, in some way more sure, more confident in what to do. What do I do?

I stumbled upon Chris Brown's new piece, "Turn Up the Music" - in particular, his remix with Rihanna. It has a quality that is dance-worthy and not entirely a guilty pleasure to listen to, as musically speaking, it hits the mark in terms of replayability and addictiveness. Although I must say, it's somewhat surprising that he could even do a collaboration with Rihanna, what with what happened almost four years ago - but time passes and time heals all wounds, hopefully. The song has absolutely raw energy to it, and the lyrics reflect this - it is minimal in theme and focuses entirely on the energy formulated by the beat and the near-dark melody. There is a haunting sort of quality to it that shows most definitely in the music video - masks and costumes are frequently worn, with a smattering of "regularly" dressed people among them. The shining moments and most impressionable are the dance sequences; Chris Brown pulls off a near Michael-Jackson edge and per...

I guess there's always that one girl whom you think is "the one" but really isn't. To think that ten-plus years of lingering affection and failure on my end of the situation would have taught me something by now. But then again, I'm speaking while staring at the end of a metaphorical end of a beer glass (which would amount to endless tracks of Backstreet Boys while feeling excessively sorry for myself). It's a rather depressing picture, now that I think about it. To be fair, it's not like looking for "the one" is my one and only dream or aspiration in life. How horrifying would it be if I had just that one "dream" to hold on to, only to have it shattered over and over as time goes by? No, I have other dreams. Somehow, though, it all seems so irrelevant when under the right circumstances and feelings of inadequacy. When you're in that sort of moment, everything just seems out of place and wrong. It's an addiction, falling ba...

I feel like a madman. I feel anxious and with so many thoughts flying by so quickly I can do nothing to preserve them. I guess this is how I feel when I'm upset. I've never really considered how to cope with being upset - often I write, or do something somewhat productive. But always, there's something in the back of my head that tells me "I need to talk to someone. I want to talk to someone", as though it is the only viable outlet to utilize. But once I find a way to deal with my anxiety, with my being upset - what-have-you - the feeling somewhat goes away. It lingers, but it slowly fades... And I guess you can say I'm feeling this way right now. Once again, the nagging feeling, the almost near-panic of needing to talk to someone , anyone , starts to fade... but I guess it'll just build up 'til I burst and go into mental break-down. Which has happened to me at least once, but I doubt anyone really noticed - I was  in my room with the door locked,...

I'm good at driving through memory lane. Everyone knows me by name. I wink and smile and ask how everything is going with everyone I pass by languidly. But I'm still stuck in the present. It doesn't matter how many times I go back. It's something I've come to resent. What does it matter? The issue's with me. I'm too busy keeping static, how I end up being so seemingly nonexistent to everyone else. Watch them move forward, sure and steady steps to a better present and a better self. How I wish I could do that myself. I let the work take me away again, my body at work, my mind turning a bend back to memory lane. So predictable, I always act the same. And yet here I am in the present. Why should I bother looking back? It's something I've come to resent. And what does it matter? It's no longer part of me. And yet I'm too busy keeping static, how I end up being so seemingly nonexistent to ...

Typhoon Sendong is akin to a mosquito biting a man asleep, who wakes irritated and finds himself in a deplorable state. Realizing this, he resolves to take himself out of this state and, simply, change for the better. Before you demand an explanation or react harshly to the analogy, let me further discuss how any of this is relevant: Typhoon Sendong hit Northern Mindanao in the Southern Philippines sometime Friday evening, December 16. Constant rain and wind affected the area, which didn't seem like much for those who live in this part of the world but eventually the constant rain resulted in flooding, with the river overflowing and sinking entire neighborhoods. Many were caught unaware and off-guard, resulting in injuries, deaths, and more than a little stress. Electricity was lost in the majority of areas that utilized it. Usable water, both for drinking and other common purposes, are in shortage. As of now, over a thousand are dead or missing, with hundreds more with no homes...