Thoughts of a Violinist Giraffe

I guess there's always that one girl whom you think is "the one" but really isn't. To think that ten-plus years of lingering affection and failure on my end of the situation would have taught me something by now. But then again, I'm speaking while staring at the end of a metaphorical end of a beer glass (which would amount to endless tracks of Backstreet Boys while feeling excessively sorry for myself). It's a rather depressing picture, now that I think about it. To be fair, it's not like looking for "the one" is my one and only dream or aspiration in life. How horrifying would it be if I had just that one "dream" to hold on to, only to have it shattered over and over as time goes by? No, I have other dreams. Somehow, though, it all seems so irrelevant when under the right circumstances and feelings of inadequacy. When you're in that sort of moment, everything just seems out of place and wrong. It's an addiction, falling ba...

I feel like a madman. I feel anxious and with so many thoughts flying by so quickly I can do nothing to preserve them. I guess this is how I feel when I'm upset. I've never really considered how to cope with being upset - often I write, or do something somewhat productive. But always, there's something in the back of my head that tells me "I need to talk to someone. I want to talk to someone", as though it is the only viable outlet to utilize. But once I find a way to deal with my anxiety, with my being upset - what-have-you - the feeling somewhat goes away. It lingers, but it slowly fades... And I guess you can say I'm feeling this way right now. Once again, the nagging feeling, the almost near-panic of needing to talk to someone , anyone , starts to fade... but I guess it'll just build up 'til I burst and go into mental break-down. Which has happened to me at least once, but I doubt anyone really noticed - I was  in my room with the door locked,...

I'm good at driving through memory lane. Everyone knows me by name. I wink and smile and ask how everything is going with everyone I pass by languidly. But I'm still stuck in the present. It doesn't matter how many times I go back. It's something I've come to resent. What does it matter? The issue's with me. I'm too busy keeping static, how I end up being so seemingly nonexistent to everyone else. Watch them move forward, sure and steady steps to a better present and a better self. How I wish I could do that myself. I let the work take me away again, my body at work, my mind turning a bend back to memory lane. So predictable, I always act the same. And yet here I am in the present. Why should I bother looking back? It's something I've come to resent. And what does it matter? It's no longer part of me. And yet I'm too busy keeping static, how I end up being so seemingly nonexistent to ...

Typhoon Sendong is akin to a mosquito biting a man asleep, who wakes irritated and finds himself in a deplorable state. Realizing this, he resolves to take himself out of this state and, simply, change for the better. Before you demand an explanation or react harshly to the analogy, let me further discuss how any of this is relevant: Typhoon Sendong hit Northern Mindanao in the Southern Philippines sometime Friday evening, December 16. Constant rain and wind affected the area, which didn't seem like much for those who live in this part of the world but eventually the constant rain resulted in flooding, with the river overflowing and sinking entire neighborhoods. Many were caught unaware and off-guard, resulting in injuries, deaths, and more than a little stress. Electricity was lost in the majority of areas that utilized it. Usable water, both for drinking and other common purposes, are in shortage. As of now, over a thousand are dead or missing, with hundreds more with no homes...

Wong Fu's new music video of Magnetic North & Taiyo Na's "Home:Word" ft. Sam Kang was like a breath of fresh air. Thanks to Wong Fu, I have a new band to listen to and genuinely like. Let's hope they stay strong and keep going at it, making genuine music. The song touches upon what is considered home, how life seems to drag you down every so often and that the only way you recover is through pieces of home, through what you consider is home. Wong Fu Productions does a brilliant job at showcasing this and the varied situations that one may find him or herself when trying to find home. I found myself smiling and teary-eyed, remembering home - the moments with my family, the places we've gone, the cold winter nights and the warm smiles. It's been five years and the longest I've been with the entire family (all five of us, and our close cousins in the States) was three months. It feels as though three months isn't enough. Have I taken them for g...

Rihanna's "We Found Love", featuring Calvin Harris, is as addictive as the music video is striking. The feel of the song is nostalgic, bittersweet. One can imagine a small smile as the song plays, and a person crying with that same small smile painting the facial features. It seems like someone is trying to reach out, and grab for something that increasingly becomes impossible to try and take. Her music video captures this perfectly and the scenes portrayed work perfectly with the song to give it a feeling of nostalgia and bittersweet love. Most would regard the song as damaging and morally degrading but that's exactly the point: the song is portraying how, even though it seems unreachable, love is found. Yet this sort of love does not last and ultimately damages the lives of those involved. Others may look at it in a more positive light but it is evident through the music video and consistent listening to the music itself that one can only find that love that was ...

... the world will be conquered one day at a time. There's really not much to say right now, as I have nothing in mind at the moment. I suppose I just felt  like writing something down. Something simple. And I suppose it'll just be this: Everything we've ever done fades away, in some sort of way into the next day, into the sun. There's nothing more for anyone. Nothing more. Cheers.